I have what I call selective seeing. While many people evidently acquire a case of selective hearing as they grow older, I’ve acquired a case of selective seeing. I only see the words I want to see.  Take for example last spring, when I was researching my trip to California. I was quickly perusing the media packet I had received and was quickly picking out some of the activities I wanted to do when toward the end of the packet I saw the words: “San, Francisco, and chocolate”. Sure, there was something about a three-hour walk, when I clearly remembered huffing and puffing up San Francisco hills a few years prior, but when you’re given permission to eat chocolate for three hours straight, not much else matters.

As a writer, I always do plenty of research upfront before committing to an activity. The San Francisco gourmet chocolate tour with Gourmet Walks was an exception to that. I figure if I’m touring San Francisco and doing so with chocolate in hand, then there can’t be much that is deplorable about that kind of experience. I can think of worse ways to spend a Saturday morning.

I went into the tour with few expectations. I was a couple days into a 10-day trip in San Francisco and the idea was starting to be planted in my head that I may soon be calling San Francisco home after a stint of traveling for several months. I was ready to settle down and I saw this as a great introduction to San Francisco. Who knew, maybe I would find a lovely belle on this chocolate tour and really never want to leave. All this time that guys spent trying to pick up girls at bars and maybe it was the chocolate shops of San Francisco where the real courting went down.

When I arrived at the designated meeting spot inside the Embarcadero Hyatt Regency, I wondered around aimlessly before I was motioned over by another guy who appeared just as enthusiastic about chocolate as I was as he waved me over. I was reluctant. While I’m not sure what a tour of chocolate lovers are supposed to look like, this group seemed to have more of the appearances of an Oprah book club. Nonetheless, I meandered over as I found a seat at the end of a large group of older married women, as our tour guide, John Cruger, the only other guy in attendance, welcomed me. Before we even stood up to start walking I was handed a couple chocolates and a “chocolate bag”, in case I needed to pace myself along the way. It was already off to a great start and I knew this was going to be a tour unlike any that I had ever taken.

Chocolate Tour Guides, including John on the end and a chocolatier in the middle

Before the San Francisco chocolate tour with Gourmet Walks, I never considered San Francisco as what I would refer to as a “chocolate destination”. When I thought of chocolate, I typically thought of Europe, and especially France. However, chocolate has a long history in San Francisco. You’ve probably heard of a little sizable chocolate company named Ghirardelli, which was founded in San Francisco. But Ghirardelli doesn’t sound very American, right? Domenico Ghirardelli, originally from Italy, moved to the Bay Area in the mid-1800s during the California Gold Rush to start the famous chocolate company. Ghirardelli has now grown from its humble beginnings as a general store in Stockton, California to become one of the most well known chocolate manufacturers in the world and the second-oldest manufacturer in the U.S., next to Baker’s Chocolate. It’s only appropriate that one of the stops on the chocolate tour was at a Ghirardelli shop.

But wait, there’s more! In fact, if I were to recommend to you the best chocolate shops to visit in San Francisco, Ghirardelli wouldn’t be at the top of that list. However, one that would be at the top is Teuscher. Teuscher has the best truffles. How do I know? Well because Oprah said so herself! If that’s enough for you, then you can skip on down, but if not, I’ll try to put Teuscher’s champagne truffles into words. The truffles are a unique, smooth blend of butter, fresh cream, and chocolate with a champagne cream center. This is enclosed with a dark chocolate ganache followed by a milk chocolate coating. Drooling yet? The proverbial icing on the cake is the powdered sugar, one of my favorite toppings and the reason for my love affair with beignets. It may just be the best chocolate I’ve ever had. I just closed my eyes and let it hang there on the top of my tongue, wondering what it would take to replicate that experience for the rest of my life without turning into Sherman Klump.

My favorite stop along the chocolate walking tour didn’t actually come at a San Francisco chocolate shop, but actually at a newsstand, Fog City News. Fog City News is at its core a newsstand, but not your typical newsstand. While it has many of the most popular newspapers and magazines, it also has many publications that are hard to find, such as European magazines. However, they’ve upped the ante for newsstands by providing premium chocolates from around the world. This includes chocolates from Spain, Germany, Italy, Belgium, and Switzerland. It was here that I saw chocolates that were so pretty that I almost didn’t want to eat them because of their presentation. Nevertheless, I caved. While many people probably see reading as a comfort activity, Fog City News has gone a step further by providing some comfort food to go along with it.

All total there are seven stops along the three-hour chocolate walking tour. If you want to, you could literally be eating chocolate the entire tour. However, that’s what the chocolate bag is for and I put it to good use. I simply couldn’t eat all of the chocolate and ended up taking a lot of it home with me. The tour is $50 and includes discounts at 10 San Francisco chocolate boutiques. Tours are available Mondays, Wednesdays, Fridays, and Saturdays, but make sure you get your tickets ahead of time. Gourmet Walks also has other tours that I’ve yet to do, including an Asian street food tour and Napa wine and food tasting.

While I may not have met a lovely belle that day that I wanted to take home, my love affair for San Francisco continued to blossom. A love that shortly after resulted in me moving to San Francisco to call home.

Thank you to Andrea Nadel and John Cruger for hosting me (Photos courtesy of Gourmet Walks). I’ve recommend this tour to many people even before I wrote this and will continue to. If you do one tour in San Francisco, make it this one. What other tour will allow you to see San Francisco and eat so well?

What’s the most unique tour you’ve ever taken?

As I grow older, the memories of my early childhood become a bit more hazy. Nonetheless, there are just some memories from my childhood that seem forever ingrained in my mind: Peeing on my first electric fence (Which was also the last electric fence I peed on), kissing my first girl, setting up a basketball goal in my parents’ carport involving an outdoor trash can and the utility room door, and seeing my first snake. However, an even more indelible memory was the first time stepping foot onto an airplane. I was five and was flying from North Carolina to Dallas, Texas. Before takeoff I got to peek into the cockpit and meet and chat it up with the pilots. A tangible memory of that first trip is the Delta model airplane I received in the cockpit, which is still in my old room at my mom’s house in North Carolina. It was there that the first seeds of my love for travel were planted and I’ve been traveling ever since.

Love for travel certainly isn’t the same as love for a friend, family member, or significant other. However, just because it’s not flesh and blood doesn’t mean travel isn’t without its own challenges like any other relationship. Travel’s flame needs to be fanned before it starts to lose its luster. Travel the same way every time and it’ll start to lose that luster. This is what happened to me just a few years ago. And when travel began to lose its luster, everything else began to lose its luster: Family, friends, romantic relationships, myself, and just life in general.

When I hear most people give their elevator speech, I’ve noticed that it typically includes two things: Where they’re from and what they do. Mine includes these two things, but sandwiched in between them is the most important part my story that bridges the two: A 9-month stint of long-term travel last year. Its the most indelible and significant part of my story because that door I opened 18 months ago to start traveling is the door through which everything else has to walk through.

When you’re sitting on a pile of debt, facing a divorce, feeling crushed because of the disappointment you’ve brought to those around you, and trying to make new friends because you’ve alienated everyone else, you have a little bit of time to think very broadly about this idea of “love”. It makes you take a deep look into yourself. That was me nearly two years ago. The death of my father a couple years prior had set off a chain of events that led me down a dead end road where love didn’t travel. I had settled and at the ripe age of 25. This was it. I no longer knew what it meant to love or to be loved, from friendship love to family love to romantic love.

After I give my elevator speech on travel, the first question I receive is typically about why I chose to travel. The short answer is for a “change of scenery”. You and I both know that that’s the five-second response that needs no elaboration. The real answer is that I had lost my sense of love and beauty in the world. Something had to change and something big.

I didn’t go into a stint of travel expecting to be healed or come out with this great sense of love like I wanted to walk around giving everyone daisies and a big hug. But I knew that I needed to uproot myself and do something drastic because it had gotten to that point and I knew it had to start with travel. Travel was one of my earliest loves. I had flown for the first time by the time I was 5, by myself for the first time at age 7, and traveled to all but a few U.S. states by 18. While most friends were playing with G.I. Joe’s and sports figures as a child, I was flying my model airplane around the house on a rainy day and building paper airplanes on nice days for outdoors. If love was going to be reclaimed, I was going to have to go back to my roots.

As I expected, at the conclusion of my 9-month trip last year, I didn’t reach enlightenment or find love abroad that made me want to go around giving everyone daisies and hugs. It was better actually. One of my most defining moments, not just on that trip, but in life, was during my last week in Costa Rica toward the end of my trip. I was sitting on the beach with one of the town’s orphan dogs, watching one of the most beautiful sunsets I’ve ever seen. As the sun dropped behind the horizon of the Pacific Ocean, I took a deep breath, closed my eyes, and smiled from ear-to-ear. I had done it. At that time, I didn’t know what it was, but whatever it was, I had done it. I had never felt such a sense of satisfaction and accomplishment in my life and I had absolutely nothing tangible to show for it. But looking back at it now, what I had done was finally started to become comfortable in my own skin -- and that was a first.

It was a few weeks later when I was back in the U.S., after watching a movie, that something happened, which hadn’t happened in years. I had just finished watching the movie Source Code, which dealt with some heavy themes about what we do with the time we have. At the conclusion of the movie I rushed outside and absolutely lost it. It was the first time I had cried in what felt like years. I hadn’t even cried at my father’s funeral. Yet here I was, in the suburbs of Atlanta, and I was a gushing baby. They were tears of joy like I had never experienced. I had started my trip in somewhat of a state of gloom with no set destination, but ready for whatever awaited. I came back a new person, one whom had never seen a world that was so beautiful. I felt freed to love and be loved again. And that person in that moment and the person today isn’t the person who left on that trip in September of 2010.

It really wasn’t until yesterday in the final hours of my 29th birthday when I realized how full circle this has all come. Rediscovering my love for travel took me through a door that all other loves must enter through. I had to first begin loving myself before I could really start loving others, beginning with family, then friends, and so on down the line. Romantic love, however, has been the most challenging. It took me nearly two years, but I’m finally not just recognizing my fears tied to romance, but facing and conquering them. It was that last puzzle piece, where I knew the big picture and what I had to do to get there, yet didn’t feel such a strong sense of satisfaction until it was actually in place. And I’m not even dating anyone at this moment and that’s alright.

Get out and travel. For a week, two weeks, a month, six months, a year. I don’t care what it is, but I challenge you to take a different type of trip then you’ve ever taken this year. Go solo, with your best friend, a lovely belle you’re crushing on, your significant other, or a group. I truly believe that there is no other way to find out more about yourself and other people then through travel. That stint of travel was the best decision I’ve ever made because so many elements of that trip continue to permeate my everyday life. And for that reason, I can’t and won’t cease to have travel experiences (And for an intermission because this has just been to much rambling on about my life, watch one of the sources of my inspiration this week from The Head and the Heart’s Down in the Valley).

www.youtube.com/watch?v=pm4dDgYhH6w

Last night I wrote on Facebook a long post about how this week was the finest moment of life. It’s for no tangible reason other than I’ve never felt so accomplished and satisfied at who I am and what I’ve become. The culmination of this week is tonight in San Francisco, where I’ve been asked to speak at Tripping’s Happy Hour about my love for travel. I’ll be sharing a lot of this story and being more candid about love and travel than I ever have. It’ll be a small and intimate event, but it really marks how far I’ve come in the last couple years. My father typically only told me that he was proud of me because of academic and sports achievements, but I think if he saw how happy and accomplished I feel, he couldn’t resist grinning himself and telling me that he’s proud of me.

What has travel taught you about love?

Heart-shaped jacuzzi tubs have a habit of following me around. Or maybe it’s just romantic travel in general. It’s rare that I stay in accommodations that don’t  have either aromatic soap, massage oils, or heart-shaped tubs. There’s a certain draw to these things that has them finding their way into guest rooms around the world. This would certainly be to my advantage if I had a lovely belle I frequently traveled around with, but that hasn’t happened in quite some time. Nonetheless, that hasn’t stopped me from running a bubble bath, sipping on a glass of champagne, indulging in chocolates, and pouring aromatic soaps like “romance” and “passion” into heart-shaped tubs. But evidently aromatic soap, chocolates, champagne, and bubble baths are more effective when there is someone else there to enjoy them with.

Romance and travel both have a certain alluring quality to them. Put these things together and that allure is even stronger. While I may not be the most suave romantic traveler, that doesn’t mean I don’t like talking about it, because whenever there’s the topic of romantic travel, you can rest assured there’s a story – often awkward for the story teller, yet hilarious for the listener. Take the topic of romantic travel to social media and the stories are even better. That’s why I was stoked to be moderating this week’s #Expchat on romance and travel.

I’m not so sure what the thousands of tweets during this week’s romance and travel #Expchat revealed. I can confidently say that it revealed that travelers can be extremely creative, since I now have over 100 date ideas that beat the heck out of anything I’ve done in the past. The chat could possibly have also revealed that travelers are practicing safe sex, since many people responded with “condoms” to the question about what one item should be packed on a romantic getaway. However, that answer was trumped by massage oil. When I asked what one celebrity people would want to travel with on a romantic getaway, one person simply responded with “George”. When I asked if they meant George Michaels, I was quickly corrected that “George” meant Clooney, and not Michaels, Costanza, or Lopez.

But how do people generally feel about travel and romance? A recent Expedia study revealed that nine out of ten adults love a romantic Valentine’s Day getaway. For as much ranting as there is about Valentine’s Day, that’s a lot of people that would love a getaway for Valentine’s Day. But really, who wouldn’t? The study also revealed that over 75% of those who have single friends are up for a non-Valentine’s Day trip. It seems like an easy choice for me. No matter how you feel about Valentine’s Day, you can’t deny the allure of a getaway for it.

If you’re like most people, you’re probably racking your brain for what to do this year for Valentine’s Day to avoid having to just pick up a box of chocolates and roses. I mean come on, you can do better than that. Well I’m here to help. I’m giving away not one, but TWO $100 coupons to use on Expedia.com.  Think of it as me empowering you to have a romantic rendezvous.

Giveaway Details

• Two people will randomly be chosen to receive a $100 coupon to use on Expedia.com.
• First way to enter: Leave a comment below, answering the following question: If you could travel with any person in the world, who would it be with and where would you go?
• Second way to enter: Tweet about the giveaway with the following link http://bit.ly/xlfSfp, using the hashtag #whathappensonvday. Here are some example tweets to get you started:

I hope George Clooney is free Tuesday, because we’re going on a romantic rendezvous if I win this http://bit.ly/xlfSfp #whathappensonvday

Why want a rock for Valentine’s Day when I can take a romantic getaway http://bit.ly/xlfSfp #whathappensonvday

• Tweeting/commenting more than once doesn’t give you more chances to win. If you tweet once, you get one entry. If you tweet 100 times, you get one entry. So this means you can get up to two entries: One for commenting and one for tweeting.
• The giveaway ends at 11:59 p.m. PST on Monday, February 13, 2012.
• Two winners will randomly be chosen and notified by email. They will have 48 hours to respond before a new winner is chosen.
• An announcement will be made on this blog post and on Twitter once the winners have been confirmed.
• Coupon can be used for a hotel or package. Full terms and conditions can be viewed here.

Congratulations to Matt Jones and Jason Castellani for winning. Go crazy!

Hopeless romantic or not, this post came under the influence of Noah & The Whale’s Give a Little Love from their Peaceful, the World Lays Me Down album. A glass of Flor de Cana was also present, which probably doesn’t have the same romantic appeal as a glass of wine. More importantly, Expedia didn’t pay me to write this and it’s not a part of my job description in the partnership I have with them. I’m not even receiving one of these $100 coupons. I’m giving them both away.

How do I sum up a year in 1,000 words? I’ve got the where down – looking out at the same scene I was looking at a year ago: The sun setting behind the Pacific Ocean horizon. The difference being that I’m now in San Francisco, taking a break in between work, compared to last year, when I was in Costa Rica and had just arrived at the beach after spending the day on a boat on the Rio Tempisque feeding crocodiles and monkeys. Yet I can’t quite put the last year into words, partly because as I’ve been looking back on the last year, I’m taken aback and speechless.

Shortly after 3 a.m. on Monday, February 13th, the official documents will record that I’m now a year older at 29. How does the saying go: A year older, a year wiser? I don’t feel older and while my number of gray hairs has increased, I don’t think I look older. But wiser? Not even close. The more I see and experience, the more I realize how little I really know. So what’s there to say about this year? If the year didn’t wear on me and I don’t consider myself wiser, what was the result of year 28?

28 was the best year of my life. I don’t know where 1-27 rank, but I just know that 28 was the best. It wasn’t without its own set of challenges, as it saw as many changes as any year prior, but those seem to pale in comparison to the joys of the last 12 months. Life really showed up this year and when I look at it from February 2011 to February 2012, I stand humbled, amazed, grateful, and filled with sheer delight. And if it seems like I’m speaking very generally, it’s because I don’t want to talk about my accomplishments, what I saw, what I did, or where I went.

What I do want to talk about is how life showed up this year, sharing with you some of the things I’ve learned. I hope that as all of you continue on into 2012, that life will show up for you too and that maybe you can find inspiration in some of these things that have inspired me. If you could care less, maybe you’ll be interested in what else happened on this day in history on February 13th or watch this amazing round-the-world time lapse video.

The fringes of my comfort zone and beyond is where my best lies. The more comfortable I am, the more unsatisfied I am and that's not serving me or the ones around me. This year saw a lot of change and as my surroundings evolved, so did I evolve. When I reached moments where I wasn't evolving and felt like something needed to change, I made those changes and the evolution and adaptation continued to occur. It wasn't enough to recognize that change needed to be made, but I had to make those changes happen because it was those moments of change that I flourished the most.

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. You want to know where I was when I saw that the world was more beautiful than ever? No, it wasn't a sunset. It was in suburban Atlanta during an afternoon of walking around the city and watching a movie. It finally hit me, and hit me hard, about why I needed to travel and to completely uproot myself to move across the country. After a tumultuous life during my mid-20s, I needed to see that the world was beautiful again. And boy was it beautiful. Ever since I've tried to see beauty in the small things and take breaks to disconnect from my connected world to experience the beauty in the world around me.

All I need is one. Just one person who I know loves me and believes in me, but I have so many more and it's more powerful than anything in this world. My support group is small, but I've never felt so loved. My Bay Area friend V, is just one of many people who I've met in the last year who are just solid rocks in my life - the kind of people I consider family. And my family, I love more than ever. They gave me just the room I needed to get my life together and have supported me amidst it all.

There's an intersection of innovation where my skills, passion, and purpose all collide. It was always one or the other. After I found myself doing work that I was passionate about, I thought it's where I would camp out on and never do anything else. However, as satisfying and rewarding as that was, it was only serving me. In the last couple months I've started to develop a life and career based on skill, passion, and purpose, and I've never been more happy with the work and life I'm producing.

Life is a journey, of which the destination is happily undetermined. Someone recently asked me how long I had plans on staying in San Francisco. My answer? When I don't want to live here anymore. When people asked me a similar question last year about how long I would be traveling, I would respond by telling them that I would travel until I found a place I didn't want to leave. That place was San Francisco. I don't know where I'll be or what I'll be doing five years from now or even next year. I spent way too much of my life living what felt like a predetermined life and it was a train wreck. The day I began a journey that had no destination, it set me free to a life that was more satisfying and purposeful then I could have ever imagined.

“Where do you recommend I stay?” This is one of the most frequently asked questions I receive. As someone who is neither an extreme budget traveler, nor luxury traveler, I find myself walking down a middle road. In the last 12 months, I’ve stayed in everything from a motel to bed and breakfast to luxury hostel to condo to cabana to luxury hotel to someone’s house. There have been different factors that have gone into booking, such as convenience, price, WiFi availability, and how long I would actually be staying at the accommodations. For example, I spent much more time in the hotel at the Hyatt Regency in Jacksonville than I stayed in the person’s Airbnb apartment in San Francisco. So to help travelers navigate the ever-changing waters of booking accommodations, I’ve come up with this guide.

Hotels

This can often be the most overwhelming part of finding accommodations. How far in advance should I book a hotel room? What amenities do I need? Should I use an online travel agency or even a travel agent to book? With so many questions, you can see why it can get so overwhelming.

I have a handful of online travel agency websites I use on a regular basis to book travel. For hotels, this includes Hipmunk, Orbitz, Hotwire, Priceline, and Expedia. I’ll then compare those prices to what’s listed on the hotel’s website. Lastly, I’ll call the hotel. Sometimes they have discounts or rates that aren’t listed on the website. I’ll especially do this if it’s a trip coming up soon. If it’s really last minute, I recommend Hotel Tonight, which is a hotel app that offers same-day hotel rates with as much as a 70% discount.

It’s important to note that while online travel agencies feature most hotels, they don’t feature all of them, such as many independently owned or boutique hotels, which are often my favorite hotels. In this case, you’ll have to be a little more intensive in your research.

Mystery Accommodations

These types of accommodations that I’m about to talk about are not for everyone. Why, you ask? Well because you don’t actually know which hotel you’re staying at until you’ve reserved it. I use Priceline and Hotwire to do this. On Priceline, it’s called “Name Your Own Price”. You get to name a price you would like to pay, but you can only select a general neighborhood and hotel star. This can provide a significant discount if it’s accepted, but like I mentioned, you won’t know which hotel it is until your card has been charged. I did this last year in Jacksonville, Florida, having a rate of $65 accepted for the Hyatt Regency, which typically would have been over $150.

Hotwire has something similar called “Hotwire Hot Rates”, except they show the price, rating, general neighborhood, and comparable hotels, but you don’t know what hotel it is until you’ve booked it. To give you a better idea of prices and hotels when using these services by Priceline and Hotwire, I recommend using BetterBidding.com. BetterBidding.com is a public forum in which travelers post successful rates/hotels they’ve gotten on Priceline and Hotwire. This doesn’t guarantee you’ll get the same hotel for the same price, but it can aid in your research to determine if it’s worth it.

Bed and Breakfasts

Bed and breakfasts are often my favorite type of accommodations. I’m of the opinion that a bed and breakfast provides the most bang for your buck. While you may be paying more than some hotel rooms, you have a higher quality experience. Bed and breakfasts typically have free wireless Internet access, complimentary deluxe breakfast, and complimentary drinks and snacks. This is compared to many hotels that may charge for Internet access and have food items, but at a price, and often a price that is double, triple, or quadruple the price of the same items in grocery stores. While you can find most bed and breakfasts doing a Google search, I recommend using Select Registry or Bedandbreakfast.com. You aren’t likely to find the same types of slashes in prices like you may find with Hotwire or Priceline for hotels, but bed and breakfasts often have mid-week and off-season specials.

Daily Deal Websites

Daily deal websites have continued to grow as an alternative for people that want heavily discounted items on restaurants, attractions, and more. The travel offerings of many of these websites have continued to grow, with some of them even offering packages that include airfare. Those travelers who like staying in a bed and breakfast or boutique hotel may prefer websites like LivingSocial and Groupon, since these are often your best chance of getting a steeply discounted rate from these types of accommodations. Daily deal websites allow you to book for a future date, but I highly recommend reading the fine print since there can be a lot of limitations. Travelzoo’s Top 20 is a weekly alert I also subscribe to, which includes other types of travel deals beyond just hotels.

Alternative Accommodations

If you're in a pinch

Everything else falls under “alternative accommodations”. This includes guest homes, vacation rentals, glamping, tree houses, yurts, and Airbnb. I recommend this type of lodging for the person who is traveling on a budget and just needs the bare essentials. I often use websites like Airbnb or Roomorama because while I may often be staying in a spare room in someone’s apartment, I’m not there long enough to justify having a hotel room. I’m predominantly there just to sleep, shower, and have breakfast. Some of the places I’ve stayed at on Airbnb have been as low as $30 per night and have included my own bedroom, but a shared bathroom. For a more curated list of these types of accommodations, take a look at Tripping.

Every once in a while I’ll stay at what’s typically being billed as a luxury hostel. However, in general, I don’t couch surf or stay at hostels. It’s more out of personal preference than anything. I’ve actually stayed at the StayON Beverly in Los Angeles more than any other place. While it’s called a luxury hostel, I think of it more as a guest house, as it doesn’t have the same ambiance of the typical hostel, but instead somewhat of a haven for the budget traveler, with shared bathrooms and quiet open spaces, but private rooms. Nonetheless, if you don’t mind the hostel experience, then you may want to look at a hostel booking engine like Hostels.com or Hostelworld.

What are your accommodations of choice?

All I’ve ever known is travel. I flew on an airplane for the first time when I was five and by myself for the first time when I was seven. By the time I graduated high school I had been to all but a handful of U.S. states and by the time I graduated college, I had traveled abroad a few times. I’m incredibly fortunate and I owe my family so much thanks for turning me on to a love for travel. All that to say that I can’t relate at all to people who tell me they’ve never flown on a plane or don’t have a passport. I’m not pretentious about it, but I’m just taken aback because travel has always been such a significant part of my life. Yet I sometimes wonder what onlookers really think of me and other travelers who are so frequently extolling the virtues of travel.

“There goes Spencer again talking about travel. He’s drinking the Kool-Aid and he doesn’t even know it. Bless his heart.” Like are these the types of conversations that people who don’t like travel have among themselves. Do intrepid travelers have a cultish nature about them? We must not because I typed in “Are travelers a cult” into Google and no results were found – because you know if it’s not on Google it’s not real.

This question of whether travelers are happier people or not is based on observing my own travels, as well as reading comments and emails from readers who don’t have the same feelings about travel as I have. After hearing how many U.S. adults don’t use most of their vacation days, I wrote a post last year asking if Americans simply don’t like to travel.  Few posts have gotten as many comments as that one did, with some commenters describing how travel hasn’t been all that satisfying. One reader remarked that work is a lot less stressful than a one-week vacation abroad. Yet another reader commented that he didn’t see the point of travel and that it had never left an impact on his life in any way. So does travel not make people happier? Or are all of us intrepid travelers just drinking the Kool-Aid?

A Business Insider article discussed 15 scientifically-proven things that make people happier and travel was one of them. In the article, researcher Bruce Heady of the University of Melbourne stated that “prioritizing success and material goals” can be harmful to one’s life.  However, that says more about material goods than it does about travel. If we trade material possessions for travel experiences, will that in turn make us happier?

The U.S. Travel Association published an article  on the benefits of travel and taking vacation, featuring statistics from multiple sources. One such statistic was from Ypartnership’s “National Travel Leisure Monitor,” which revealed that 82% of affluent leisure travelers consider vacation important to their well-being. A study of University of Tennessee employees in Dr. Mel Borins’ book, Go Away: Just for the Health of It, revealed that life satisfaction increases during vacation and then continues upon returning. These statistics appear to point toward a correlation between travel and one’s happiness.

But if travel really does increase happiness, why don’t people travel more? Worldwide, one-third of people don’t use up all of their vacation days, with that number being much higher in some countries, according to a Reuters article. The same article cited that in the U.S., less than half of Americans use all of their vacation days. If people really are “gravitating more toward experiences than possessions”, as this New York Times article put it, then why aren’t people traveling more and why is Apple reporting record profits and doubled iPhone and iPad sales? Is it money? Because the iPad 2 starts at $499, which is the same price as a long weekend of a Living Social Escape on a British Columbia houseboat or round-trip flight this summer to St. Lucia.

A year and a half ago I merged my dreams of travel and writing into one to set off on a 9-month trip. I was a mess. I was not happy and I knew something big had to change. Knowing some of my happiest moments in life had come while traveling, such as spending the winter holidays one year in Paris and living and traveling around South Africa for two months, I decided that the big change was going to be a stint of travel. I didn’t go into it expecting  to turn my frown upside down, but went into it with few, if any expectations. The conclusion: The person I came back as 9 months later isn’t the person I left as. I came to see that the world was in fact beautiful – more beautiful than I had ever imagined and it took that trip for me to realize it. It gave me a sense of satisfaction and fulfillment like nothing else ever had. No job, girl, or trophy had given me the satisfaction that that trip gave me.

If you start traveling more, will you become a happier person? I can’t answer that for you. All I know is that for me, travel makes me a better person, whether it’s a few days or a few months. I come back from a trip refreshed, invigorated, happy, and with a new outlook on the world around me. But I can’t say that it will have the same effect on you. I told you about the readers who have traveled extensively, but who haven’t been affected by it. But what I do know is that people want to do what makes them happy. Humans go to great lengths, no matter what the cost, to strive for happiness. I also know that with my final dying breaths, you will NOT hear me utter the following words: “I wish I would’ve just been at home more, spending more time working and watching television, rather than all that time spent traveling.”

What effects do you think travel has on your well-being?

Is it really the final week of January? It seems like just yesterday that my barber was asking me if I had any New Year’s resolutions (Actually it nearly was. It was three days ago and she followed that up with telling me that I was too young to have gray hair). January is one of my favorite months of the year. For one, because it’s the last full month I get to enjoy at my current age, and secondly because it’s a time of eager planning as I begin preparing for my 2012 trips. One way that travelers can kickstart their 2012 travel planning is by attending a consumer travel show. I’ve been to a few travel shows now, including a return visit this weekend to the Los Angeles Times Travel Show.

Travel shows, like the Los Angeles Times Travel Show, are meant to get consumers excited for travel in the coming year. This weekend, tourism boards, tour operators, airlines, and hotels from around the world will descend on the Los Angeles Convention Center to spur wanderlust. This is also a chance to meet and learn from some of your favorite travel personalities. The Travel Channel’s Adam Richman, who I interviewed last year, is part of a lineup of speakers that includes authors, chefs, photographers, and television personalities.

This week I’ve met with some of the exhibitors for the Los Angeles Times Travel Show, including Jim Pickell of Baja.com. An added perk of travel shows are some of the special offers and giveaways that are exclusive to guests. Baja.com is giving away multiple prizes, including accommodations, charters, cage diving with great white sharks, and surf camps. You know where to find me on Saturday!

However, with hundreds of exhibitors and an extensive schedule, consumers can come home from a travel show with more questions than answers. I often get home with a bag full of business cards, brochures, pins, and pens, and don’t do anything with it. So if you’re going this weekend in L.A., or to any other upcoming shows, as either media or a consumer, I’ve developed this guide to help you better navigate the travel show waters.

Consumer

• Know before you go. You’ve heard it before, but I can’t emphasize this enough as an important characteristic for savvy travelers, even at a travel show. Do some research on the shows, exhibitors, and destinations beforehand. Write down some questions and have a pen and notepad handy when you arrive. This is your chance! When else are you going to have this many destinations and travel experts in the same room together who are eager to help you?
• Make a 2012 bucket list. Make a list or even multiple lists and rank the destinations and activities on there. This can make the show feel a lot less overwhelming. Go to the exhibitors at the top of your list and work your way down. If you have more time, then you can visit some of the other booths. Even consider destinations and activities in your own backyard. You better believe I’ll be visiting the Catalina Island and Oxnard booths!
• Map it out. Write down exhibitors and speakers you want to see and then make a plan for the day. The Los Angeles Times Travel Show also has a mobile guide with a floor plan, exhibitor directory, speaker schedule, and more.

Media

• Have a focus and know the questions you want to ask. “Hi, I’m a travel writer and I’m going to Cancun this spring. Got any freebies for me?” That would be how NOT to approach exhibitors. Have an idea of destinations and stories you’re interested in over the coming year and ask questions based on that. Even ask if they host writers or press trips. However, also be prepared for questions they ask. They’ll be interested in things like your style of writing, your reach, and distribution of the outlets you write for.
• Arrive early on the first day. Plan on really making meaningful connections on the first day. Make a good first impression because exhibitors will get a lot of faces and names and they aren’t likely to remember many of them.
• Have a stack of your best business cards. Not just any business cards, but your best. Make them stand out, whether by the design or the content, because exhibitors are going to be inundated with business cards. Don’t just place in a bowl or their business card notebook, but make a meaningful connection and hand it to them so they can put a card with the face.
• Focus on tourism boards. Don’t dismiss other exhibitors, but tourism boards are often your best resource at a travel show. You’re often talking with the very decision makers who would be helping with your trips and assignments. Larger exhibitors may have sent sales people or representatives who deal more with the consumer side of travel shows.
• Follow up afterward. Expect your inbox to be inundated with press releases shortly after attending. However, to make meaningful contacts, make sure to talk with the right decision makers or get the contact information for those people who you can later follow up with. Be clear about your interest and communication preferences so they can best serve you.

Have you been to a travel show? What were your experiences?

You’ve probably heard about and maybe even seen many of the most popular movies that inspire travel. It probably wouldn’t take too much effort to list 100 movies that inspire travel. A few of my favorites include Eat, Pray, Love, In Bruges, Midnight in Paris, Waking Ned Devine, and The Bourne Identity. But what about TV shows that inspire travel? No, not like No Reservations or Swamp People, but sitcoms and drama series. I’ve been considering this recently, especially with an addiction to shows in which the city they are set in are often as much a part of the show as the characters. Here is my round-up of a few of the best television shows that inspire travel to the destinations they are filmed and/or set in.

1. Lost. Surprise, surprise! There are few shows that attracted such a following like LOST did. While it’s been off the air a couple years, its popularity continues with many people comparing new dramas to LOST like they compare the latest tablets to the iPad. I even wrote about what LOST taught me about life a couple years ago. However, while many people were drawn into the story, the scenery had quite the allure to it as well. While no one wants to be on a deserted island with a smoke monster and a hostile group of inhabitants referred to as “the others”, who wouldn’t want to travel to where most of it was filmed: Hawaii. A large majority of filming took place on Oahu. While travelers can see some of the filming locations without too much effort, there are also small group tours that can be arranged. Other cities featured in LOST included Los Angeles, Seoul, and Sydney.

2. It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia. Dead giveaway right? Philadelphia is actually one of just a few U.S. destinations I’ve wanted to vist, but never have. Watching It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia has given me a renewed interest in visiting Philly. Much of the show takes place in Paddy’s Pub, which is a fictional bar. However, there are scenes from the show that take place throughout Philadelphia. Well known South Street is shown in the opening credits and other Philadelphia attractions include the Laff House, Philadelphia Java Company, and the Philadelphia Museum of Art. Visit Philly even has an It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia itinerary.

3. Alcatraz. Anyone who knows me should be well aware that this is no surprise. Alcatraz takes place in San Francisco, features one of my favorite U.S. attractions, is full of history, and has a strong LOST element, since it’s produced by co-creator of LOST J.J. Abrams and features Jorge Garcia (Hurley from LOST) as one of the main actors. The real LOST junkie may even recognize the music from the show by LOST composer Michael Giacchino. While Alcatraz is front and center of the show, it also features scenes around other parts of San Francisco, including Russian Hill and Ft. Mason. It also includes scenes of San Francisco’s famous fog.

4. Hawaii Five-0. Are you seeing a recurring theme here with Hawaii? Hawaii is on that list of a few U.S. destinations that I’ve yet to visit and Hawaii Five-0 has given me all the more reason to travel there. While crime dramas don’t often bring a sense of incredible travel inspiration, it’s the scenery and attractions I’ve been drawn to. I mean it is in fact Hawaii so you can just imagine some of the scenery. Some of the highlights have included the USS Missouri, Paradise Cove, and the National Memorial Cemetery of the Pacific. On top of all that, there are the frequent scenes of street food, which I’m no stranger to. Popularity of the show has all the appearances of benefitting tourism in Hawaii. Many attractions featured in the show have seen significant increases in visitors, including Kona Brewing, which saw a 60% increase in sales.

5. Treme. Named after a neighborhood of the same name, Treme follows the lives of several New Orleans residents shortly after the Katrina disaster. This is no travelogue or action-packed drama. As an HBO series, it deals with deeper issues then you find in your typical primetime drama. However, Treme does things that no other show on this list does. It goes beyond the sights to provide a glimpse into the culture of New Orleans. New Orleans is a city full of culture and character, unlike any other U.S. metro, and Treme brings this to light as it tells the story of residents who are putting their lives back together after Katrina. Having spent a week in New Orleans last year, I can testify to the resilience and love that residents have for their city.

What TV shows make you want to visit the city they are filmed and/or set in?

Sunset at San Francisco’s Ocean Beach

Today’s photo of the day comes from Ocean Beach in San Francisco at sunset. You can find me at Ocean Beach often. In my opinion, it’s one of the most underrated parts of San Francisco, with nearby Sutro Baths and Sutro Heights Park and the Lands End Trail, which winds its way around the rugged coastline and provides great views of the Golden Gate Bridge. The Sunset neighborhood was even recently featured by AFAR Magazine.  Got a travel photo you’d like featured? Send me an email to spencer.spellman {at} gmail dot com with the photo, a brief 1-2 sentence description of the photo, your name, a photo of yourself, and your website/blog and I’ll put it in the queue for consideration. If I use your photo, I’ll link back to the website/blog/portfolio you indicate.

“So you’re kind of like the philosophical traveler”. My friend’s father noted this as we drove up Highway 101 to Sonoma County over the Thanksgiving holiday. I chuckled, responding with: “Yes, I am in fact kind of like the philosophical traveler. Traveling philosopher actually.” My friend’s father had put this together without knowing about my blog, looking at my business card, or knowing much about the history of my life. This had simply come up after talking about my reasons for being a travel writer and my college degree in philosophy. However, it got me thinking about my own philosophy of travel and that of others. As “The Traveling Philosopher”, a name that I’m now becoming known for, I thought it couldn’t be a better time to start a series on the philosophy of travel.

Why do you travel? “Spencer, because I love it; duh.” Okay, you like to travel. That’s probably why you’re here, but why do you really travel? Travel is expensive, time consuming, an investment, and offers many of the same opportunities that you can experience from home. You use public transportation, eat a lot of food, take photos, view landmarks, go out for entertainment, and go to bars for cocktails. What’s so different about that from what you do at home? These are some of the arguments people have for choosing not to travel. So what’s your answer? Why do you travel?

Before beginning with why it is that I travel, I think it’s important to lay out what travel isn’t to me. Travel isn’t the seeing of sights. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve done plenty of iconic touristy activities, like visiting Alcatraz, walking to the top of the Eiffel Tower, and having my photo taken along the rim of the Grand Canyon. Yet this isn’t why I travel. I also don’t travel simply for rest and relaxation. I like rest and relaxation as much as the next person and don’t really travel like this enough, but it’s not why I travel. I also don’t travel for an escape or to be healed. Travel has never healed me or fixed my problems. I’ve traveled for all of these reasons at one time or the other; however, at its root, it’s not why I travel.

Travel has a funny way about it. I’m often the type of traveler who may spend mere minutes at a place people recommend spending days at and then spend days somewhere that people recommend only spending minutes at. Some of the great inward changes and revelations as a result of travel have come in some of the least likely places. One being in Atlanta last spring and most recently, flying into Seattle from San Francisco.

I had been wrestling with this question about why I travel for days. I couldn’t put my finger on why it was that I really traveled. But then, the clouds parted, literally. We had started our descent into Seattle and for the first time since leaving San Francisco, the clouds had parted, but just enough so that out my window to the left, I could see the sun beaming directly onto Mt. Rainier. The clouds continued to part as purple, orange, and pink colors now lit up the sky as the sun started to set. I had seen some beautiful sunsets recently along the central and northern coast of California, but this was something different altogether. It was in that moment that I realized why I travel. I travel for change.

Change. I know, it’s a broad term, but I think it best sums up why I travel. In every sense of the world, change is why I travel. I travel for a change of scenery, for a change of clothes (From sweaters and boots to board shorts and flip flops), for a change of culture, and for a change in my schedule. But most importantly, I travel to be changed. When I think of the most significant moments of my life, travel has always been a part of those moments. One way or the other, the person I depart on an airplane as, isn’t the same person I arrive back as. And this change has a direct influence on my peers, friends, and employers when I return from traveling.

My philosophy of travel isn’t likely your philosophy of travel. Chris Guillebeau put this nicely a couple years ago when he talked about developing your own philosophy of travel. I’ve often gotten emails and comments from readers who simply can’t relate to what I’ve written about here on my blog because no matter how many times they’ve traveled, they haven’t experienced travel the way I’ve written about it. And that’s alright. People travel for different reasons and have different results because of it. However, while I believe that people’s reasons for traveling will vary from person-to-person, I wholeheartedly believe that people should develop their own philosophies of travel – that is, to find out what fuels their drive to travel and work to recreate those times of happiness that we often feel while traveling. In a sense, to recapture that wonder of adventure that was so prevalent during our childhood, but becomes harder to attain as we get older.

“We travel, some of us forever, to seek other states, other lives, other souls.”-Anais Nin

If you’ve ever taken a philosophy course, then you may have noticed that philosophy professors rarely, if ever, reveal their own philosophy of the subjects their teaching. Over the coming weeks and months I’ll be writing an on-going series on the philosophy of travel. Some of it will be observations and things I’ve learned during my travels, while others will be questions that I’ve received from other travelers. However, to start the series, I wanted to go against the common philosophical grain and explore my own philosophy of travel. Over the coming weeks, I hope you’ll share your own questions and comments, whether here, on Facebook, Twitter, or Google.

Why do you travel?

Photo of me courtesy of Kirsten Alana.